Dear 'Friend'

by Jacob Stinson

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Dear 'Friend'
Your words cut deeper than you know,
As I constantly prepare for the next verbal blow.
I try to show you that I care,
That life is hard and I'll be there.

But that's not enough, is it?

Your retorts make me sick,
as you kick me where I'm bruised.

But you don't own me,
and you don't know me.

I write to express the constant anger
That I have to digest towards you
Cause what good would it do?
for me to lash out and tear you into two?
My fangs are sharp and I thirst for the mockery of your name
but I must remain composed,
and content.

Because that's what you expect.

Forever silent, in your presence
the obedient dog
at your feet,
afraid of being disposed.

but how could you know?

Were you there for the times when I hated myself
loathing my own existence?
There for the days when I sold myself to those who would be there
"If you will do..."
There when I slammed my fists against the walls
time after time again,
my eyes revealing the horror I felt of being alone.


All I ever heard was my heart crying out for more
as I gave myself away like a whore
trying to feel something that was similar to 'love'.

And I can fill these pages with all the hate my heart can muster,
but what good would it do?
for me to lash out and tear you into two?
because you are just like I was,

Alone and confused.

Dear 'Friend'

I. Love. You.


released April 27, 2014
recorded at Asbury University
Piano/vocals: me
Sound effects: The Internet




Jacob Stinson Indiana

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